How I Want to Feel
That Barenaked Ladies song has been going thru my addled mind, "One Week," the catchy one that ALL of us scrambled to memorize its quirky lyrics to catch up with the fun little tune....You know the one, suuuuuurrre ya do. I've been reflecting that it's been just a little over a week since I began the battle to get my life, my health, and my sanity back.
I have been diligently keeping to entering in all the stuff I'm doing--water, food, exercise (or, in my case, somewhat-lack-thereof-but-improving-this-week), into the MyFitnessPal.com app, and I'm even trying to be good about posting at least a weekly entry on the blog portion. You can read it by clicking on the link here:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/HavaTwizzz/view/settling-in-126842
As I mention in that entry, I'm just settling in. For the long haul. I've really been doing a lot of thinking--scary, I know, because now my hair's growing out all crazy and I can almost start twirling it again!! Makes thinking for me that much more dangerous, because working with my hands and doing something physical always unleashes my inner Twizzz. Ommmmm.....
Well, so, I've been reflecting on how everything in life that's worthwhile, praiseworthy, and good (according to my faith, things we, as Latter-day Saints, seek after) is always a struggle. These things don't come easy, we always have to fight to achieve or obtain them. Why? Well, I guess it's because we wouldn't appreciate or even know their value without struggling to pay the price to get them. The whole "For it must needs be opposition in all things" concept. Yeah. That.
Now things are clicking into place, and like Debbie Harry's song says, "I can see clearly now/all obstacles in my way." And I understand. I get it. Why struggling with my weight, balancing my inner Twizzz, and my life is such a struggle. Because it's WORTHWHILE. It's GOOD. It's PRAISEWORTHY (well, I don't know about that last part, but hey, sure). That's why it's so hard. :::flashback to my favorite spiritual/inspirational framed picture and quote of the Savior embracing someone in a heavenly setting with the quote, "I never said it would be easy. I only said it would be WORTH IT."::::
But, it's all up to me. My choice. How do I want to FEEL--physically, emotionally, spiritually--once I know THAT, once I make my CHOICE, the struggle is to stick with it. And, boy, by "struggle" I DO MEAN STRUGGLE. Keep experimenting upon the word, if you will. Keep gaining that sure knowledge, testimony, and then POWER about that said word or principle, and eternally work day-by-day to apply and live it. Become it.
So, what's different about my decision to "I gotta get back/to the place where I come from" THIS time around? I now understand. I now see clearly how my choice and my struggle empower and strengthen me. Combined with the knowledge that "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" I am also taking this to the Lord to draw strength from HIM.
I can do this. I know this is a daily, sometimes hourly, struggle. It will be. Always. It's SUPPOSED to be, if it's worth it. And IT IS. I FEEL IT. So, there's no other option for me but to DO IT. Like Yoda says, "Do or do not. There is NO TRY."
Yessss, Grasshoppahhhhh, I am conceding points of wisdom that I'm now ever-so-slowly starting to see and understand at my sagacious age of 38.
I have been diligently keeping to entering in all the stuff I'm doing--water, food, exercise (or, in my case, somewhat-lack-thereof-but-improving-this-week), into the MyFitnessPal.com app, and I'm even trying to be good about posting at least a weekly entry on the blog portion. You can read it by clicking on the link here:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/HavaTwizzz/view/settling-in-126842
As I mention in that entry, I'm just settling in. For the long haul. I've really been doing a lot of thinking--scary, I know, because now my hair's growing out all crazy and I can almost start twirling it again!! Makes thinking for me that much more dangerous, because working with my hands and doing something physical always unleashes my inner Twizzz. Ommmmm.....
Well, so, I've been reflecting on how everything in life that's worthwhile, praiseworthy, and good (according to my faith, things we, as Latter-day Saints, seek after) is always a struggle. These things don't come easy, we always have to fight to achieve or obtain them. Why? Well, I guess it's because we wouldn't appreciate or even know their value without struggling to pay the price to get them. The whole "For it must needs be opposition in all things" concept. Yeah. That.
Now things are clicking into place, and like Debbie Harry's song says, "I can see clearly now/all obstacles in my way." And I understand. I get it. Why struggling with my weight, balancing my inner Twizzz, and my life is such a struggle. Because it's WORTHWHILE. It's GOOD. It's PRAISEWORTHY (well, I don't know about that last part, but hey, sure). That's why it's so hard. :::flashback to my favorite spiritual/inspirational framed picture and quote of the Savior embracing someone in a heavenly setting with the quote, "I never said it would be easy. I only said it would be WORTH IT."::::
But, it's all up to me. My choice. How do I want to FEEL--physically, emotionally, spiritually--once I know THAT, once I make my CHOICE, the struggle is to stick with it. And, boy, by "struggle" I DO MEAN STRUGGLE. Keep experimenting upon the word, if you will. Keep gaining that sure knowledge, testimony, and then POWER about that said word or principle, and eternally work day-by-day to apply and live it. Become it.
So, what's different about my decision to "I gotta get back/to the place where I come from" THIS time around? I now understand. I now see clearly how my choice and my struggle empower and strengthen me. Combined with the knowledge that "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" I am also taking this to the Lord to draw strength from HIM.
I can do this. I know this is a daily, sometimes hourly, struggle. It will be. Always. It's SUPPOSED to be, if it's worth it. And IT IS. I FEEL IT. So, there's no other option for me but to DO IT. Like Yoda says, "Do or do not. There is NO TRY."
Yessss, Grasshoppahhhhh, I am conceding points of wisdom that I'm now ever-so-slowly starting to see and understand at my sagacious age of 38.
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OK, y'all have been kind enough to "hear me out"& n stuff, so let me know whatcha think, if I've rattled yer cage, voiced a shared thought or concern, or if you're gonna attain Enlightenment upon reading these DEEP THOUGHTS, or if ya think I'm just plumb WACKO--but please be decent in your expression of your sentiments, there's no need to sling mud, unless we're in POTTERY CLASS or at the BEACH! Thanks for reading n stuff...Laters!